Tanja was living a normal, busy life with her husband and 2 sons. As an English teacher, she was always trying to energize her students and her family, encouraging them to climb trees, go to the park, go snowboarding – anything to live life to the fullest.
Her eldest son, Nick, was a typical 17-year-old boy. He liked to hang out with friends and played guitar in multiple heavy metal bands.
In June 2012, Nick started complaining about back pain after getting thrown in a mosh pit during a concert. After visiting the walk-in clinic, he started vomiting in the parking lot.
His grandfather took him to the hospital, where Nick found out he had testicular cancer.
“It was 6 p.m. and Nick had been in the hospital for hours. My dad had left a message saying the doctors wanted to talk to us, so I picked up my phone and called Nick.”
He said, ‘Mom, you're not going to like this. I have cancer.’
Nick’s diagnosis changed everything for Tanja and her family.
“I loved everything about life. I'd say okay guys, let's go climb trees; let's go to the park; let's go snowboarding. It was go, go, go. There was so much joy, music and laughter in our lives.”
“And then Nick got diagnosed. Things changed, obviously. After his death, our lives became unrecognizable.”
Starting treatment
Nick’s diagnosis was a huge shock to the entire family, but he was given a strong prognosis: a 96% chance of survival.
He had one testicle removed because it was the main source of the tumour, but his doctors also found a large tumour in his stomach that had grown close to his lungs.
Nick then began intensive chemotherapy which had serious side effects. For the first week he vomited constantly.
He also developed osteonecrosis because of the chemotherapy, which meant that the bones in his knees were wearing down and weakening.
Nick had an endless number of extreme symptoms, from high fevers to terrible chest pains and going in and out of consciousness.
“I was terrified because my kid would be going into cardiac arrest or having high fevers, but I wanted to stay positive in front of him.
“But when the doors are shut, you’re crying and you’re screaming in your car. I thought whatever was happening would pass. And then it happened again. And again. And again.”
Coping with cancer coming back
In 2013, the cancer came back. Nick started chemotherapy again and had a stem cell transplant.
However, even after the transplant, the tumour didn’t shrink.
As Nick’s main caregiver, Tanja found it hard to see her child go through such a long, painful cancer experience.
“The repetition of chemo, surgery, radiation, chemo, then more surgery went on and on. It was just a cycle. Nick never really felt like himself.”
Tanja began searching for resources for support and decided to call the Canadian Cancer Society’s Cancer Information Helpline (CIH). Through CIH, she was connected to one of the Canadian Cancer Society’s peer support programs.
Using this service, Tanja was able to speak with other caregivers going through a similar experience and helped her realize she wasn’t alone.
"The people on the phones were super nice. It was nice to hear a reassuring voice. Let's put it this way – it got me through the week.”
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Facing cancer as a young adult
Despite everything, Nick would always try to live his life to the max.
One time when the cancer came back, Nick took the family car and went to a festival for the weekend, before coming back to start treatment again.
“Through all his treatments, Nick was remarkable. He never complained. We started having huge house shows to get him through his cancer, so we would have a mosh pit in our basement. We had 10 bands that would come here and about 300 kids.”
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Early the next year, Nick’s healthcare team suggested he have a major surgery called retroperitoneal lymph node dissection, where lymph nodes in the back of the abdomen are removed.
He was told there was a high risk that he would die on the operating table.
With no other options remaining, Nick decided to go for the surgery. Twelve hours later, his family heard applause in the operating room.
However, after 6 months of getting back to regular life following the surgery, Nick’s tumour markers went back up.
Sharing Nick's story
After Nick died, Tanja began volunteering to honour young adults with cancer. She organized large concerts to raise awareness for a group she believes is often overlooked.
“There isn’t enough support for young adults with cancer. They have to worry about their fertility, their schooling, their work. There tends to be more mental health issues as a young adult with cancer too. It's a real mental challenge; I think even more so than if you're a kid.”
Through her work, Tanja has tried to draw attention to how hard cancer can be for young adults.
“Nick was put into pediatric cancer when he was diagnosed at 17-years-old. You go into these beautiful rooms with big windows and there’s ice cream and yogurt and places to play and social workers. The minute you turn 18, you’re moved to the floor with adults, put in a room with an 80-year-old. And you never see another person who's your peer there.”
She says her son viewed his diagnosis as a wake‑up call - one that changed him into a deeply compassionate and selfless person. Caring for him also changed her.
Although their mother‑son relationship had always been strong, cancer deepened their bond even more.
It transformed our relationship; it was transcendent. It was a love that surpassed all understanding.
She says the experience has left her unafraid and far more empathetic than she was before. Above all, she hopes Nick’s story reminds others that cancer does not just affect older people.
“I think it's important to be aware that cancer is not just a disease of older people. Just because you're young doesn't mean you can't get cancer.”
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